Small domain change and yet another effort in self improvement.

04/01/2021

I wouldn't actually say I've stopped typing here since I last posted, but the dates don't lie. 

If you follow my blog and have an eagle eye then you may have noticed that my domain has changed again. I have gained a '.co' for the sole reason of saving a wee bit of dosh. Domain registers seem to make a business of luring you in with low costs and then making your renewal about five times the price. I wasn't having it. Got this one for £1.2, where I would have been looking at £15 for the old one. This is maybe a heads-up that in a years time I might change domain again. If you access my blog through Instagram then this won't be a problem. This domain is actually better than my old one in terms of memorability: does the layman ever think of .uk?

Since this is a new year, I'm at a point in time where I am forced to evaluate my life: Although I attempt to do this more as a constant process. I won't recount all the different ways I have viewed happiness and success in the past but I will explain my process now. I may in the future move on from this process. It is pseudo-academic and although I think the academics of living are mainly about gate keeping and egoism, it is very possible that there may be something to them.

The central idea for my current outlook is that fulfilment comes through self improvement and reflections as opposed to hedonism. This sounds obvious, but I've become very aware that depending how a philosophy is explained, it can be painted as two very different pictures. Self improvement is not something that is easy, in fact telling yourself to do something just for the sake of bettering oneself is very close to doing something just because other people are doing it. I do not like mindless action, and I see it all the time in my life. It is in most instances correct, and well intentioned, but without any thought, actions can be seen as though they are just a product of egoism. For example, the education of your pears through Instagram slides. Many people feel compelled to repost these slides because they are broadly for a good cause. Often times I find that these slides are received as universal truth, and there is not many questions asked about what is being said. I often find issues but will refrain from commenting on them in fear of being lynched by the blind. Yesterday I saw one, that turned signing petitions into a silly gambling esque game. Where you picked a number at random and the corresponding number had a petitions you had to sign on the next slide. I felt very uneasy that rather than evaluating the facts and motives of the petitions, many people would sign them because they were compelled by a slideshow. The issue seems to be that whilst the good intentions are there, many movements are a matter of the blind leading the blind. Being told the you are abnormal for feeling/not-feeling emotional about one thing, and therefor compelled by your ego to carry out an action meaning very little to oneself. Repeat this and you have the emotional homogenisation of the masses.

I've also been watching a load of 'chad' motivational videos. Basically just wojak memes turned into crude animations. Whilst this certainly isn't the ideal place to receive advice, it presents it without the arrogant wall of academia books. The philosophy of the chad, which is the same as the one I presented earlier, is that fulfilment comes from the betterment of oneself and the shepherding of ones peers towards the betterment of themselves. It is a very simple philosophy and it contains all of the things that have been abrading me over the past couple years. The main thing being that I've watched my brother continually work towards living the 'chad' life, whilst I have been stuck living a life in the future filled with short term pleasure. This has always bugged me and was actually bugging me before the start of last semester. The online learning blow set me back, but that's no reason to give up now.

I feel the loosing interest feel at the end of every paragraph. This is something I have to fight. This is probably the main reason there are so many thing I'd like to do that I've not yet done. I always stop when I start to feel uncomfortable. I will start to proof read these posts, in an effort to help me become more emotionally surefooted. 

There is also the limitation of a blog and the readers interest. Sticking to one point is another thing I think will majorly help me and many parts of my life. I have more in my head but this is getting a bit long in the tooth. I'm sure with time I will become happier with what I type. It's important to remember that no one was born running.

More to be written soon. Thanks for reading. x